Fightin' Dirty
Don't worry, it's just our way

Fightin' dirty is the bedrock of our existence. Here are a few tips and tricks to get you on your way, courtesy of Petunia.

• Call Narrow Fucks up on their crimes against Chubsterism at any time of the day or night. Use whatever weapons are available: crank calls, jelly, tough looks, meanness and violence.

• Grab food out of anyone's mouth, any time, to put in your own. Chub Need Food Now.

• Hold a Sit-In. Pin down and smother a vocal (or even non-verbal) Narrow Fuck. The Sit-In finishes with a bounce.

• Reclaim street corners colonised by Narrow Fucks.

• Spread rumours and lies, use disinformation to confuse the enemy, then show up an make 'em really scared.

• Storm fashionable events and have the time of your life. Walk in stone cold and tear the shit down.

• Tag Chubster terrain with the Screaming C .

• Throw a potato massacre: dump a mountain of potatoes (or potato remains) on the doors of diet centres in cities around the world and vandalise: "Save the Carbs."

• Don't forget to use the Tools of the Trade.

We also enjoy:
• glued locks
• strategic vomiting
• citizens' arrests
• creating panic and confusion
• fun and subversion
• thieving for pleasure
• lever use of stink bombs, flour bombs, water bombs, paint bombs but maybe not real bombs • If in doubt, pick a fight and/or act crazy. Your body is a weapon, but remember to try not to get arrested.

• Here are some more ideas for mischief.